Chapter 175
0175
(Lily POV)
After the phone call with James, I had another small panic attack. James was on his way here. Was I ready for that? For whatever that would mean?
I left Black Moon so that I could be on my own and independent for a while. I had quickly come to love it in Ravenswood, and even in the short time I have been here, I have found myself growing as a person and as a she-wolf. Coming here was absolutely the right decision for me.
With James on his way, what would happen to the life that I have started to build? What would James want and expect with respect to our relationship? Would he expect me to give up my independence now
that there is a new safety threat?
Truthfully, I have come to really enjoy the last couple of weeks of daily phone calls and text messages with James. Being able to develop a friendship with him, while physically separated by a long distance, has made me feel more comfortable than I probably would have been had we tried to do that while living
in the same town or same pack.
Was I ready to take things beyond friendship? Was I willing to work on repairing our bond? Was I ready to
trust him?
“You already trust him, Lily,” Rose pointed out. “I did not encourage you to tell him about your panic attacks, about Stephanie being alive, or about anything else you told him. You did those things on your own. Old Lily would never have dreamed of sharing information with Old James, much less important information. New Lily did not hesitate to share with New James.”
Okay, fair point.
But… hardly any time had passed. Time heals all wounds, right? Had enough time passed to heal all of our wounds? Or was James coming here going to make things complicated again? What about Brady? I
really did not want to be part of a love triangle again.
“Sometimes it is not the amount of time that passes, but what happens in the time we have. A lot has
changed for both you and James in a very short period of time. I do not see your heart being conflicted anymore. I still see fear, but even that is diminishing.” a
I sighed. Sometimes Rose is more of an older sister than a wolf. It can be annoying at times.
“But you love me.”
“Yes, I do love you, Rose. But let me panic in peace, please. I need to get it out of my system.”
“You know, Old Lily never would have been able to talk things out or panic peacefully. And Old Lily may have even been on a plane to Antarctica right now, instead of waiting for James to get here. Tonight’s panic attack has been pretty boring if you ask me.”
I rolled my eyes. “Out of my thoughts, Rose.”
Rose sent me a visual of her sticking her wolf tongue out at me. I laughed.
Several hours later, at around six in the morning, I heard James knock on my apartment door. (He had
texted when he landed asking for my address.)
The moment I opened the door, he silently grabbed me and wrapped me in a tight hug. He hugged me so tightly that I could barely breathe, but I really did not care. As soon as I felt his arms around me, any remaining fear or panic left in me immediately evaporated. James smelled amazing, the sparks between us felt stronger and comforting, and Rose and I were both really happy to see him.
I did not know what the future held for us, but at least at that moment, I knew that being in his arms was
exactly where I wanted to be.
After a minute or two, James loosened his grip enough so that I could let him into the apartment. As I let him in, I noticed that he was wearing a tuxedo shirt and jacket, with his tie loose and the first few buttons
of his shirt unbuttoned. His hair was a little messy, and it appeared he had not gotten much rest on the
flight here. Despite his exhaustion, James looked s**y as hell.
“Old Lily never thought about Old James that way,” Rose linked me.
“GET OUT OF MY THOUGHTS, Rose!”
Rose laughed and then happily laid down in my head.
As soon as I closed the door behind him, James pushed me against it, grabbed my face with both hands, and kissed me. I immediately melted, relishing the feeling of his lips against mine.
“Hi,” he whispered breathlessly once we broke apart.
“Hi,” I responded back with a smile. “Are you tired? It looks like you have been up all night.” James nodded. “I am exhausted. But I am so glad to see you. I was scared to death.”
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